Frenchie Fever

So I found out I don't really have as much to say as I thought. I'm not one to blog about what I did today; I more like to blog about a significant experience or something I learned but at this point who cares, eh? It's not that I haven't learned or done fun things lately I just haven't thought to blog. So, I've let you down. All 3 of you. Especially the two of you that sit at a desk all day and occassionally have a free minute to surf the 'net. ;) For that, I am sorry.

Works been awesome as of late. My favorite little patient has become our very own little PCICU miracle and may be going HOME soon. It's crazy to think that about 3 months ago we were going to have to withdrawal care on him because he'd become too sick...and now, he's lying here smiling at me and doing things we never thought we'd see again...like go on wagon rides! There's something special in store for this lil dude. At such a young age he's already made so many people fall for him. I'm pumped and blessed to be a part of his life.

So, I'm forseriously considering getting a dog. I may be taking the puppy plunge. It really happened when Kara and I went to the dog park with Bella last week and there they were....two precious, fawn colored french bulldogs...just starring at me..and I starred at them. meant.to.be. I've wanted a frenchie for years now and recently I'd convinced myself it's a bad time and I don't have the money. Both of which are true...but then I met Daisy and Cooter(yea, cooter?) and I was back havin' puppy fever(much like Bieber fever except they are actually attainable). So, I've researched. I found a lady in western ky that breeds frenchies to sell--not to show, so they won't be 2g. I emailed her about a lil male fawn on the site but he had been sold already. It actually works well b/c I'd prefer a lil lady frenchie....Kara says they don't hump things and you can rub their belly without a lil thingy down there. True mayne, true! Anyway, the lady said they are breeding a couple females within the next couple months so Ima hollaaaa at her in the near future. It's very possible I will own a female fawn french named Fran.....jk about the Fran part, it went with all the Fs. Maybe something like Josey, Riley...something with an "ee" on the end b/c they(dog expert ppl) say they respond better to that. Either way tho I'm gonna be calling her my sweeett puuppyyy babyyy!! i'm stoked!

It's official. I will be attending my 2nd TaySweezy concert in Nashville, TN come Sept 16, 2011 with the most magnificant Emelyn Davies. It wasn't easy but we did obtain tickets. For some reason, despite being apart of the TaylorNation fan club I did not receive my presale pass code--rubbish! This meant I had to purchase my tix with the non-TayNation folk. It certainly felt like Me vs non-Taynation folk that morning. I spent 30min on ticketmaster.com and calling them and I couldn't get a ticket. After 30 minutes she was officially sold out....to all the non-TayNationers..psh. Anyway, that aint gonna slow my roll. StubHubs my new bestie...but she comes at a high price. After several days of debating with myself how much money I was willing to spend I contacted Emelyn and we decide that you couldn't put a price on a Tay Swift "Speak Now" concert in NastyNashville and we lucked out with some lower level seats.....Needless to say it should be pretty fun. I probably shouldn't have told yall all that. Slightly embarrassing. Whatevs. p.s. i'll miss you Angie!

Hm what else is new... I've started this new devotional. It's a Beth Moore bible study called A Woman's Heart: God's Dwelling Place. I'm diggin it. One night recently I stayed up til 3 (that's not unusual these days but consider that night I'd gotten in bed at 1) doing my devo and then just reading scripture. What's cool about God is that as a believer you know that you have the Spirit within you and Jesus is camping out in your heart, right? But there comes a point in your walk with Christ that you no longer just know it but you FEEL it. That night I began to feel it more and more. As I kept reading it made more sense. It's like I said, I knew it all before, but there was a point when God totally interjected and was like ok NOW you're really gonna get it. In the Old Testament God called the Isrealites to build a Tabernacle for Him so He could dwell with His people but now he dwells in my HEART. Side note: Switchfoot "Your Love Is a Song" is my repeat song right now.

Man, blogging at work can really pass the time on a slow night--not complaining, just saying!! Last night I had a ridiculous patient. One of those love/hate relationships. She was the sweetest lil thing but my goodness was she a hot mess. At one point I just sat by her bed and talked to her for 15 minutes b/c of the hilarious things she'd say. She was 4yrs old and absolutely convinced of two things: 1) I was a doctor and 2) my name was Lateesha...neither of which I denied. Her favorite things to say were "Doctor, am I well?" and I'd respond "Yes, you are well, now, but you were very sick which is why you and I are having this slumber party" &. "Miss Lateesha, are my arms broken?"(she had on arms "restraints" b/c she tried to pull her IVs out) & I guess she watched lots of TV cuz she was willing to fall out of bed to get her " 'mote" (remote) so she could watch The Little Einsteins. Thank the Lord it happened to be on at 3am. Another fav was if she woke up when I wasn't there I'd herar this soft yell "hellooo?? where is everybody?? Doctor Lateesha, where is everybody!!???" so I'd knock on her glass door/window and wave and she'd calm down. She would lay her little head down on her pillow and just watch me through the glass door in my other patients room. She must've really loved her Lateesha. Even though she was cute and sweet she was a handful and I was oh-so-glad to see her gone when I returned to work tonight.

Anyway, enough rambling. I hope erbody enjoys their day!! mucho loveo to all!!!.......i just realized my one blog could really be lots of blogs...oh well.

Proceed with Caution!

Recently I experienced a "first time" at work. This, honestly, was one of those "first times" I prayed would never come to pass, but it came, and it came hard. You know how when you have not-so-ideal news to share with someone so you just kind of beat around the bush with small conversation hoping for that right opportunity to come up so you can just ease on into it? Then that opportunity never actually comes so you just have to flat out say it? Well, that's what I'm doing. So, this is me flat out saying it: I had my first patient die. It was a baby. She was so precious. I've always thought I'd be tough; whatever happens happens and you move on. It's what I signed up for, right? eh. Not so much. Yes, working in the ICU I knew that death was something I'd be faced with on a daily basis, but being a part of this situation is far different from simply imagining how I'd react to losing a patient. This is not to say I don't love my job b/c I truly do. I couldn't imagine being anywhere else. However, I'm human. It's sad and it's hard no matter how many times you have experienced it. Needless to say, this left me with lots of questions. Not just medically what went wrong but on a spiritual level...on an eternal level.

My question for the longest time has been: do babies/children go to heaven? Google that. It will infuriate you one second then having you rejoicing the next, but the fact of the matter is we must turn to God's word. The Bible is the only truth--not what some random person decided to post on the dotcom one day. It's interesting though, even if I'd never opened the bible I would know, just looking at this baby, she was with Jesus...so sweet and peaceful. I was overcome with a sense of this is where she was supposed to be. I felt like baby was being held in our Father's arms that very moment. I stood there holding baby in my own arms all alone in the room and cried a little. I cried b/c I was sad she ever had to live through pain and I cried b/c she no longer had to. Instead, she was healed in heaven. After I was done with everything my charge nurse let me leave work early that night, around 345am, b/c it had been an exhausting night. On my way home I couldn't help but think of all the times when I was younger that I'd have a bad dream and run into my parents bed to snuggle between the two of them. I resisted the urge to do so and headed back to my condo.

The bible says "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" John 3:16. So, whoever believes in Jesus Christ will go to heaven. What about those who've never even heard of Jesus? Well, it also goes on to say in Romans 1:20 "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse." Basically saying that if you're living in this world you're witnessing His creation so you have no excuse but to believe in Him. So what about those babies who are too young and lack the mental capacity to comprehend salvation? Too young to understand that the world they live in was created by a Higher Power? Welp, friends, our God may be a just God but He is also very merciful. 


Read on to Deuteronomy 1:39 "And the little ones that you said would be taken captive, your children who do not yet know good from bad--they will enter the land. I will give it to them and they will take possession of it." I realize there are several verses that say no matter what we are born sinful (Romans 5:12) but I also know that in order to be saved or condemned we will be faced with a decision the day we encounter Jesus Christ. Do we accept and believe that He died for us or do we reject this truth? God will condemn those who reject Him,  right? But as a baby you are not capable of making such a decision. All in all my belief is that this sweet baby, along with the rest that we lose too soon, is resting peacefully in Heaven. 

Lastly, I read about a sermon where the pastor said "God does not call innocent children to heaven. That comes from circumstances brought about by the earth. But He is there to welcome them with open arms." That quote is pretty comforting. I actually heard that long before this happened but it was kind of like God had it stashed in my back pocket for that night b/c he knew I'd need it. 

I know this post is kind of a lot and I probably make no sense, but if you take nothing from it I just ask that you pray for this family who lost a daughter, granddaughter, niece, cousin, loved one...Also, please pray for those involved in her care. I know that where I work this happens somewhat often but it goes unspoken on the unit and I can't help but worry about what my co-workers take away from all this. Ok, I'm donezo. Keep it reals...Thanks for readdinngg!!! love you!!

Three's Company

It's official. My blog is on the brink of going viral. It's coming in right behind Lady GaGa videos and Marcel the Shell!....except not really. I've finally reached three followers. That was my goal going into this. If I can just get three people with enough time on their hands to read my blog then it's worth it. Why three? Well, b/c there was a show once called Three's Company so I've always just felt like three was a good number. Anyway, Emelyn, welcome inside my mind.

What's happening in my world? To sum it up Vince Young is no longer privelaged enough to wear a Titans jersey, I hate the Miami Heat now more than ever, and I'm a fantasty football champion(good run, Emelyn).

Thoughts on VY? ABOUT TIME! Good luck on your future endeavors.

Miami Heat? Ok, anyone(team) that compares themselves to the Beatles is just arrogant. Plus, Heatles just sounds gross. Lebron ruined his reputation when he felt he was important enough to block off an hour long conference/announcement on ESPN just to tell us he was a traitor. I may be harsh. I can't relate. I've never been the 2nd best (yea, 2nd) basketball player of all time and in search of an NBA championship ring. The only reason it moves me enough to blog is b/c I've recently rekindled my love with the Bealtes and realized, all over again, their brilliance...and b/c I've got nothing else to say. But their brilliance is far more superior than a Sir James. As I write this I'm listening to some of their greatest hits. "Let It Be" just about sums up how I feel about life.

"And when the night is cloudy, there is still a light that shines on me, shine until tomorrow, let it be."

What I love about their music, and Coldplay (that's a whole 'nother love affair), is although it's what we consider secular music I find it can be kind of spiritual. A lot of truth in it; a lot of simplicity. The song "Let It Be" reminds me of what one of my best friends, Kara, said in a convo recently. She said that there wasn't much in life that we can control so take take control of what we can- ie) our health, our end of relationships, and our relationship with God. Other than those things life is going to run it's course whether we want it to or not...and that's when we just have to let it be. There's always gonna be an end; there's always gonna be an answer-you just have to be willing to find. There's always some positive amidst the struggles. Life happens, we have to embrace it, trust God, and make the most of it. It's like that saying "Let Go and Let God". yeayea.

Back to sports. I have mixed feelings about the end of the Titans season. One thing I look forward to more than anything each week is Titans games. One thing I least look forward to each week is watching the Titans embarrass Tennessee with their fighting, penalties, lack of ability to overcome adversity, whiny quarterbacks, and vulger, bird-flipping owners. Nonetheless, I still love the Titans and would root for them every day of the week. I'm partially glad the seasons over now though. We needed a change and we needed it fast. The sooner the change the sooner we can move on to bigger, better, and maturer. VY is a good quarterback and I hope that he will excel elsewhere...just not on Sundays when he's playing TN.

I feel like this blog was kind of all over the place. I dig it. All in all, go titans and let it be. Peace and blessings...peace. and. blessings.

Learning curve

According to Wikipedia "The term learning curve refers to the graphical relation between the amount of learning and the time it takes to learn." So, this would mean "time elapsed" would be charted on the X axis with "knowledge gained" on the Y axis....aka my line would be really flat _______ Only joking, kind of. I've found the more self-relfection, biblical studying, and living independently I do that the rate at which I'm acquiring knowledge has increased. It's not a huge increase, it's more of a very slow, gradual incline but, nonetheless, I'm learning. 


What am I learning? Well, mostly about congenital cardiac defects and their corrective surgeries  BUT also about relationships. For example, what it means to be loyal, faithful, selfless, respectful, honorable, generous, kind, accepting, and tolerant. I've always been the "I'd rather have 5 best friends than 100 good acquaintances" type, but now I wanna be both. The more the merrier right? People teach you things. They teach you how to love, how not to love; how to help, how not to help; how to teach, how not to teach; how to speak, how not to speak, etc. The more I know the better friend I can be. I found a verse recently that states it pretty plain and simple. The 11th book of the New Testament is a letter written to the Church of Philippi from St. Paul known as  Philippians. I really love Philippians b/c I often feel like Paul is writing directly to me. He is very encouraging and uplifting. He teaches us that we have to preach the Word through everything that we do--good or bad. We are to live a life worthy of the Gospel and it can't just be with our words but through our actions. What better way to share Christ than the way we treat people? Philippians 2:3-4 says:

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." 

I'm finding the more I grow in the knowledge of God the more I desire to be more like Him. Now I just need to do it. I suppose, with this new year, this can be my resolution. I need to see that incline steepen(is that a word?) Along with attempting to train for the music city half marathon...but we'll just see about that one. 

Anyway, the holidays are over and it's time to get back to the grind. Oddly enough, I'm excited to get back to work. I miss my little patient and the good people that I work with. I also just like that feeling of working real hard and deserving the couple days off. I hope that all two of you who read this have a blessed week and know that I pray for you always! 

Fashion vs. Keeping All My Fingers&Toes.

It's 1:15 am Wednesday morning and I'm packing..err...was packing for my trip to NEEEWWW YORK concrete jungle WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OF(who doesn't do that eveytime they say "new york" now?)...but I decided to take a break from the headache to blog. Blogging wasn't my first thought. I really just wanted my nightly chocolate ice cream but when I sat to eat it I thought maybe this was a good time to share my situation(to all two of my friends who read this--whom I've already texted about my situation).

So, here's my delimma: I want to attempt to dress cute in NYC, I want to fit it all in one suitcase, but I want to stay WARM, ergo, I want to take all my jackets. The problem is the number of jackets I feel I need for each outfit don't want to fit in the suitcase. So, I guess it comes down to do I want to blend in with the fashiony ppl or do I want to keep all my appendages? Although, Southwest bags DO fly FREE so I could have more than one bag....but who really wants to be that girl that has to go to baggage pick up when all her friends don't? Hmm....so you see why I have a headache. 

Anyway, good news: I got called off work on Christmas! yea! I got to spend the night with my family, then see my lifetime(not the tv network) girl friends, then hang with Miss Kara and MH! It was a fun, unexpected Christmas present from the PCICU. However, I was soon back to work. I spent the last two nights with my sweet little patient, "Bubba". Now, I'm off for one day and then head to the great state of New York!

While packing for NYC I couldn't help but think about the next time I'll be packing for a trip. Weird, I know. If the packing is stressing me out so much why would I even want to think about the next time I have to pack? Well, it was more like I wondered where I may be going next, for how long, how far, and if I need to get a larger suitcase. I didn't have to wonder long cuz I actually have an idea of where it will be, when it will be, who it will be with, and what size suitcase I'll need. I suppose I'll fill you in on my next adventure (although, I do hope there's more in between). 

In July I hope to go to Africa. Pshyea, I know. When I was a freshman in college I started hearing about the Invisible Children. I remember some people came to host a convocation about the Invisible Children in northern Uganda and I bought the documentary to check it out. It opened my eyes to hate in this world I never knew existed. I'd heard about poverty, war, and genocide but this really brought it to me. Three guys from Cali risked their lives to document the conflict b/t the government officials and the rebel army. They spent nights with the very children that were hiding from the rebels so they wouldn't abduct them and train them to to do evil. Ever since then my desire for mission work with children has grown-- Especially missions in Africa. Is it weird to say that much hatred has inspired me? I think you know what I mean. I've always prayed for the opportunity to present itself when God felt I was most ready. James 1:27  says " Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the word". If you say so, God! I am in a place in my life that I can do this. It will take time, it will take money, it will take a giant leap of faith but I know God will provide.  Like I said in my first post, this blog is meant to hold me accountable. I've been too comfortable in my bubble and I'm making strides to get out of this comfort zone. I'm pretty sure Africa falls under the umbrella of "outside my bubble". 

The deets, you may ask....this all came together one night when my good friend Kara and I were discussing our faith and how we have so much room to grow. We talked about needing a radical change and wanting to experience something drastically different from our day-to-day life. Turns out, Kara had been praying a lot about mission work as well and she discovered a non-profit organization called Visiting Orphans through a friend of hers. So, God willing, July14-27 we are planning on going to Uganda and Ghana. I'm continuing to pray for the courage, wisdom, time from work, and the finances among many other things to make this possible. Please pray, too! and if you feel a calling to go then holler at me! The more the merrier!

Now that I've shared with you what my next big move is I should probably finish packing cuz my plane leaves in like 8 hours. Thanks for listening, praying, encouraging!

Merry Christmas from the PCICU!

As much as I'd love to be home with my family for the holidays I can't help but be happy that I'm here, at work, too. I was super bummed and being all mopey like "pity me I have to work on xmas eve"...but then, I heard Santa coming. I knew it was him b/c I heard his sleigh bells. They weren't on his sleigh, he'd taken them off to come inside the PCICU. He claimed it was a health violation to bring the reindeer on the unit but I don't know if I buy it. There's a reason Santa is so fat and it's not just cuz he eats billions of cookies on christmas--he's lazy. Anyway, Santa lifted my spirits about 25%. There was still 75% to account for.

Santa made his rounds through the unit giving presents to all the boys and girls spending the evening here. Then, Santa made his final stop. My patients room. We'll call him Bubba for HIPPA purposes. I was so excited for Bubba to meet Santa! I couldn't help but think Man, he actually gets to SEE Saint Nick! what other kids can grow up to say that? awesomesauce!  

As Santa walks up to his room a crowd of co-workers gathers behind him to catch Bubba's reaction when the two see eachother. So, I draw back the curtains and there is Bubba!....asleep. Juuust snoozzzing. Now, if you know this child, you know he NEVER sleeps!! What are the odds? So the pressure was on. I had to do something! Now, this might've been a little rude but I had Santa jingle his sleigh bells real loud and within a second Bubba's eyes SHOT OPEN and scanned the room! Then he caught a glimpse of the big red man in the door and starred at him contently as if thinking "I don't see many men with white hair on their faces and red caps on their head but IIII LIKE it!!" Bub then raised his hand up slowly and waved at Santa Claus with his chubby, warm, pink hands. Santa waved back with a grin and gave him his gifts. Then, as a thank you, sweet Bubba smacked his lips together to blow the Santy Man a big fat kiss. My heart just melted. Unfortunately, S.C. missed it. So, I said "can you blow another kiss!!??". Welp, apparently not. He shook his head no and cried. You see, Bubba only has so many kisses he can give away on certain days. Today he only had one kiss reserved and it was for Santa. Sorry, man in the sleigh, but maybe next year...

Needless to say, the other 75% was not only fufilled but exceeded. I'm so blessed to know and love this miracle child. The patients here, this one in particular, are a reminder to us all to keep fighting, keep smiling, keep playing, keep loving. It's almost a new year so we can all strive to be as awesome as these little babes for 2011!

It's time to watch Frosty the Snowman. Catch you on the flipside. Merry Christmas and don't forget: Jesus is the Reason for the Season! God Bless!

The Virgin Blogger

I'm not gonna lie to you, b/c that's a terrible first impression, but I've never been a fan of blogging....until I started working night shift and am up at unhuman-like hours and get real bored. First, I gave in to Twitter. I was probably the first person to ever say "I refuse to get that tweeter thang it's the dumbest idea I've ever heard of"....and then, as you can see, I folded on the blogging trend. So, here I am. 2:41am. I just finished putting together a Christmas gift to a dear friend who's changed my life a lot in recent months. Very cool how that happens. I'll get into that later.

So, now that you understand I'm really good at giving into the latest internet trends(yes, I realize blogging is a more 'old school' trend but new to me?) I guess I'll start with who I am and what I want to accomplish with this blog. Then I'll just talk about my family and friends b/c quite frankly I'm probably the least entertaining blogger you'll ever encounter. Please excuse my grammatical grammers. My 6th grade teacher, Mrs. Pitts, tried so hard with those sentence diagrams but I just couldn't wrap my head around it. 

My names Anna. You can call me....Anna. It works well. My parents called me that when I was born and it stuck? If you can think of anything better that's not crude, rude, or just dumb feel free to do that. The present day I am a nurse at Vanderbilt Children's hospital in the Cardiac ICU. I've been there for almost a year now and, still, every time I say it I feel so blessed to not only have a job but to have the job of my dreams. You know, the funny thing about my last statement is I really never dreamt about being a nurse in the PCICU but alas, I am. It wasn't 'til I got there that I realized this was what I'd been searching for all along. I guess God thought it would be more fun to surprise me than give me a heads up. Side note: I'm really glad there's spell check on here. Nonetheless, I'm very lucky and couldn't imagine not working with my little heart babies. I'll tell you more about my life later...

My mission for this blog is for you to hold me accountable. For so long I've had thoughts, ideas, interests, etc. and kept them to myself, or maybe even told my mom once or twice, but they never came to fruition. No more straddle the fence on this stuff anymore. So, here it is: My number ONE mission is to be a servant for Jesus Christ. Mission number two is figuring out how I can do that. Mission number three is, welp, doing it. Mission number four is sharing it. Enter scene: blogspot. yea! 

As ppl get to know me they find that I am a very habitual human being. I like my comfort zones. I like where I am and I absolutely do not like change. I think growing up in the same house, city, school system, friend network my whole life instilled that in me. I realize God has called me to serve in Nashville at Vanderbilt but I also feel a calling for even more...even further. In order to break my cycle of comfort I'm stepping outside my bubble...one small step at a time...It started when I switched churches. I LOVED the church I used to attend and thought the pastor was an amazing person but my heart was uneasy. I didn't feel like I fit in and even more importantly I didn't have the desire to. I pretty much went to church by myself for 2 years. I invited ppl and some would come, others decided not to, but I didn't pursue them as I should've. After much prayer and talking with close friends I decided to look for a new church home. I was almost embarrassed to admit that for awhile. I mean, I've lived her my entire life and I'm looking for a church family? Shouldn't that be established by now? Well, not necessarily. I need something different. I've grown; I've changed.

I'm now attending Brentwood Baptist church on Sundays and Tuesdays(Kairos). Just this past Tuesday I talked to a girl about her "20 somethings" sunday school class. Well, alright! I do believe I'll give it a go. Making this switch has been so awesome. I've got a core group of friends that attend with me and I feel like I'm where God was telling me I should be. I love my old church but I had to move on. All this to say, I'm listening and I'm trying to make changes to further my spiritual walk with Christ. I find the more I pray, the more I hear, the more I desire to do, and it becomes this fun cycle of living out God's will. Paul says to the Jews and Gentiles of Rome in Romans 12:1-2:


"¹ Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. ² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

Has anyone ever told you Paul knows what's up? Ok, well, I am. He's baller. God speaks so much truth through paul. Everytime I read it it's like a pep talk. Ok so anyway. Thanks for listening to me ramble. This is just the start...


Over-n-out